From the Shower to the Ocean, This Is How to Have Underwater Sex
One of the defining features of sex is wetness.
You need some kind of lubricating agent — saliva, naturally produced vaginal secretions or a personal lubricant you bought at a sex shop — for sex to be enjoyable for either partner.
That’s why it sort of makes sense that scenarios involving water can make people think of sex. There’s also the fact that usually, when in water, we’re either naked or scantily clad. You don’t bathe in your clothes, and lots of people go swimming in form-fitting swimsuits that make even skimpy underwear look bulky and prudish.
But despite all those water-based situations leaving people in the mood for sex, getting it on in water isn’t as simple as it seems (and there are definitely ways to do it wrong).
To help ensure that you’re safe and having fun, here’s a guide for how to have sex in water — from the ocean to the shower.
How to Have Sex in Water
One of the first things you should know about water sex is that it can be very dangerous. You shouldn’t be attempting water sex with either partner fully submerged under the surface — that can go very badly wrong, and drowning is the last thing you want water sex to lead to.
So make sure you both keep your heads above water, and take the necessary precautions you’d otherwise take if you weren’t having sex — stay close to dry land, use flotation devices if need be, don’t go anywhere there’s a current or big waves, etc.
Another important thing to know about water sex — more about pleasure than safety, this time — is that, even though water is wet, it’s not a lubricating agent. In fact, it’s the opposite.
“The water pressure can wash away water-based lube, and your body’s natural lubrication, so try using a silicone lube,” says Jess O’Reilly, host of the @SexWithDrJess Podcast, who suggests Astroglide’s Diamond Gel.
Another important thing you should know? Despite what you may have heard, sex in water won’t kill any sperm. Basically, slipping into the nearest pool or lake won’t reduce your risk of pregnancy. That’s why you should keep a condom handy if you’re considering penetrative sex.
“Condoms reduce the risk of unwanted pregnancy and STI transmission, and using a condom-safe lube can also reduce friction,” says O’Reilly. “If you’re using suntan oil, be sure to shower before using the condom, as oil can increase the risk of condom breakage.”
Considering all those potential complications, O’Reilly suggests that penetration might not be the dream form of water sex you’ve been imagining.
“Consider various types of sex beyond intercourse, which can be uncomfortable underwater,” she notes. “Don’t feel pressured to do it all in the pool, lake or ocean — instead, you might want to rile yourselves up in the water with teasing, touching and kissing and then move to dry land to continue the dance.”
That being said, if you are intent on getting it on in a watery locale, here’s how to do it right — from safety tips to the best sex positions for each scenario.
How to Have Ocean Sex
Like any kind of water sex, sex in ocean water requires a degree of caution. Even if you can both swim well, drowning is a real possibility that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Stay near shore, make sure at least one other person knows you’re in the water and have a plan in place for how to get back to land safely.
Is It Safe to Have Sex in the Ocean?
If there’s one place to have sex in the water that’s probably the least safe, it’d be the ocean. Beyond the vastness and depth of the world’s oceans, tides, undercurrents and a plethora of less-than-friendly aquatic wildlife mean there are more possibilities that things could end poorly. However, if you’re near the shore or otherwise at a fairly shallow depth, ocean sex isn’t necessarily much more dangerous than sex in a lake.
Can You Use a Condom in the Ocean?
If you’re maxing and relaxing on the beach, take care with regards to the products you’re slathering on your skin. “If you’re wearing sunscreen or oil,” says O’Reilly, “take a shower before putting on the condom and having sex, as oil also weakens the integrity of latex condoms.” That being said, condoms won’t be affected by the salt water any differently than they would be by fresh water.
Does Salt Water Kill Sperm?
Nope! So, as per above, consider using a condom, or sticking to sex acts that aren’t likely to produce a pregnancy (oral or manual stimulation).
Best Ocean Sex Position
O’Reilly suggests sticking close to shore with a sitting position she calls a “Beach Lap Dance.”
“One partner sits in shallow water,” she says, “and the other faces them, sitting on top.”
How to Have Lake Sex
Lakes, often ringed with cottages or cabins for people to enjoy summer getaways, can be a great place to get it on in the water. You’re out of the city, surrounded by nature, and a little bit of skinny dipping can easily turn into something a little more sensual.
Is It Safe to Have Sex in a Lake?
Somewhat safer than ocean sex is lake sex. Of course, not all lakes are created equal; some are so large they might as well be small oceans — the main difference being that lakes are freshwater, not saltwater. However, lakes can also contain dangerous wildlife, so it’s a good idea to have some facts on hand about the lake in question before you jump in and start going at it.
Can You Use a Condom in a Lake?
Yes! As with oceans, using condoms for lake sex is a strong choice.
“Condoms can still be used in the water,” says Annabelle Knight, Lovehoney sexpert, “but it is important to make sure, as with any time after sex, that you check the condom didn’t slip off or break during sex. Ensuring you use the correct shape and size is the best way to avoid this from happening.”
Does Lake Water Kill Sperm?
Like ocean water, lake water won’t kill your sperm. Not to mention, if you ejaculate outside of your partner, your semen could still find its way into your partner’s orifices. That’s why you should still wear a condom.
Best Lake Sex Position
As with ocean sex, O’Reilly suggests staying close to shore. If you’re at an aforementioned cabin or some other location where there’s a dock leading into the lake, taking advantage of that can be a fun experience.
“One partner sits on the edge of the dock in shallow water,” says O’Reilly, “and the other stands in the water between their legs to offer an oral treat.”
How to Have Swimming Pool Sex
If you’re not able to make it out to a sandy beach or a secluded lake, swimming pool sex is a more accessible option for many people. There are pools all over the place, and while public pool sex is probably a no-go, private pools aren’t exactly in short supply. You might have one in your backyard right now!
Is It Safe to Have Sex in a Pool?
Unless you have a kiddie pool or other above ground pool that’s filled with a hose, pool water is typically chlorinated to help kill bacteria.
However, though it’s not fun to swallow and can be harmful if ingested in large quantities, chlorine in the water won’t impact your sex life. So long as you’re both keeping your heads above water, pool sex can be completely safe.
It’s also worth noting that if you’re getting it on in the pool, there are probably no lifeguards present, so if anything happens, drowning is still a risk. Be smart, and don’t try this while inebriated.
Can You Use a Condom in a Pool?
Pool sex is a little bit more complicated than lake sex and ocean sex when it comes to condom use, but that doesn’t mean you should dispense with them entirely.
“Although it’s possible that the chemicals in pools and hot tubs can compromise the integrity of the condom, it is still better to use one than to ‘go bareback,’” advises O’Reilly.
Does Pool Water Kill Sperm?
Unfortunately, as with freshwater and saltwater, chlorinated water won’t impact the potency of your sperm — meaning you can still get someone pregnant in the pool. Thus, you should use a condom, or stick to non-penetrative sex.
Best Swimming Pool Sex Position
Unlike most lakes and beaches, pools offer good opportunities for penetrative sex by giving the receiver a place to balance themselves while being penetrated by their partner.
O’Reilly suggests a pool position called the “Bend Over Baby,” where “one partner bends over against the side of the pool, and the other approaches from behind.”
How to Have Hot Tub Sex
Hot tubs have a well-worn association with sexiness. Besides the heat, bubbles and the relaxation they’re supposed to produce, they’re inherently social spaces where the focus is more on sitting in your bathing suit (or in the nude!) and talking with other people than swimming laps or jumping off diving boards.
Is It Safe to Have Sex in a Hot Tub?
So long as the heat isn’t scalding hot, hot tubs are safe to have sex in, and given that they’re much smaller bodies of water compared to oceans, lakes and even pools, drowning accidents are much less likely.
Can You Use a Condom in a Hot Tub?
As O’Reilly noted, it’s possible that condoms might fare less well in a hot tub than in a natural body of water, but that doesn’t mean that using one is a bad idea.
Does Hot Tub Water Kill Sperm?
Despite the heat involved, hot tub water won’t kill your sperm, so don’t think that hot tub sex gives you a free pass for ejaculating willy-nilly.
Best Hot Tub Sex Position
A great option for hot tub sex is a riding-style position, such as the Cowgirl, where one partner sits on the other’s lap, both partners facing each other.
However, unlike bathtubs, hot tubs are typically equipped with underwater jets — the pressure from which can be an excellent way to stimulate your genitals, so making use of that can be a great means of foreplay for both partners.
How to Have Bathtub Sex
If you live in an apartment in a big city, a hot tub might be a faraway dream. But there’s still a pretty good chance you have a bathtub at your disposal — and yes, these can be a good place to get it on, too. Of course, some bathtubs are too small to realistically support two people having sex, but if there is enough room for you both to fit in together, then there’s enough room for you to have sex.
Is It Safe to Have Sex in a Bathtub?
“As long as you use a condom and water-resistant silicone lube, bathtub or shower sex can definitely be a safe option,” says Knight. “Just remember that silicone lubes are not compatible with silicone toys. If you want to use a silicone toy, we recommend a small amount of oil-based lube instead.”
Can You Use a Condom in a Bathtub?
Yes! Like any other kind of water sex, you can definitely use a condom.
Does Bath Water Kill Sperm?
As with all the other types of water on this list, bath water does not kill sperm.
Best Bathtub Sex Position
“Cowgirl is what you want here, as you can get maximum pleasure from minimum movement!” says Knight. “This means that the water stays in the tub, where it belongs.”
Have one partner sit down, and the other partner get on top of them — though Reverse Cowgirl (pictured) is also an option if you prefer not to face each other.
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“Use a grinding, or circular motion instead of thrusting for added stimulation,” adds Knight, “and if you need extra support, grip the sides of the bath with your hands.”
How to Have Shower Sex
Some bathrooms are bathtub-free, but if you’re still yearning for some watery loving, shower sex is also very much a possibility — and it doesn’t mean you have to do everything standing up, either.
“Make use of the space,” says Knight. “You don’t need to stay upright in the shower; depending on its size, you could take it to the floor. Sitting sex positions are ideal for shower sex, and provide maximum skin-on-skin contact to up your intimacy levels.”
Knight also has an important tip regarding the grooming products around you: “Don’t use soap or shower gel as lube!”
“It may be tempting in the heat of the moment to leave the lube and keep the passion going, but please resist,” she says. “Soaps and gels are not intended for internal use, so keep them for squeaky clean skin and not for sex.”
Is It Safe to Have Sex in the Shower?
“You may also want to be mindful about the position you choose if you’re having sex in the shower, as it can be extra slippery,” says Knight. “This is why extra support can be necessary.”
Can You Use a Condom in the Shower?
As with every other form of water sex, condom use is not only possible but encouraged when it comes to getting it on in the shower.
Does Shower Water Kill Sperm?
In case you hadn’t picked up on the theme yet, shower water won’t have any effect on your sperm. “One of the biggest misconceptions is that water kills sperm, when it in fact does not have any effect on sperm,” says Knight.
Best Shower Sex Position
There are lots of possible position options for shower sex, but one easy one is where the penetrating partner enters the receiver from behind.
You can do this free-standing, but you can also do it so the receiver is pressed up against the shower wall, which offers some support. Regardless, in this position, either partner can manually stimulate the receiver’s genitals with a water-safe sex toy or their hands.
All illustrations by Carlee Ranger.
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